Lousy documentation at its finest

This post's going to have to be short because I desperately want to get out of work to go play poker. The short version: I just spent the last three hours in a rage at MySQL because, for a new person following the documentation on their site, it's hard to realize that despite example after example of calling a stored *FUNCTION* with CALL [function name](); syntax, said syntax applies only to stored *PROCEDURES* and you should call a stored function like so : SELECT [function name]();

Fuck, sometimes I hate my job as a developer and I wish I could just go work at a bar, like certain friends. And it's been one of those days.